Loved's Journals

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stop eating

so much

but you don't

eat at all

but thrice a day

just like they

say

but fat is what

you stay

/

So, so you think you can tell
Heaven from Hell,
Blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field
From a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?

Did they get you to trade
Your heros for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange
A walk on part in a war,
For a lead role in a cage?

How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We're just two lost souls
Swimming in a fish bowl,
Year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have we found?
The same old fears.
Wish you were here. ©

i LOVE THESE PICTURES!

Ten thousand superballs rolling down a San Francisco hill-street

These photos document the release of 10,000 small superballs at the San Francisco hilltop corner of Filbert and Leavenworth. Wow. Pic 1, Pic 2

i needa do this one day !

(talen from from the great BoingBoing.net)

stoned

i got stoned out my damned face last night. oh it was a good stone. it wasn't even a whole blunt. just half-a-blunt of blue'sclue's [what we call the weed. don't ask, i don't know either.] shit, aka speedy's shit. it was some good dro. such a good one. unfortunatly i had to enjoy it by myself in a dark room, only lit by the TV, which was muted so i could listen to my shuffle in peace. and scribble some thinkings and thoughts down. highdeas, some potheads would call it.

anyhoo-hoo. i got bored. and my eyes felt like they were being jerked with a string every second i would try to focus on something.

i wrote some high poems!!

some of them i can't understand at all. my handwriting sucks.

but i'll write what i can read.

everything was written in slants and diagonals and upside downsies.

here goes nothing !

High Ass Poems

"so high your ass will fly!"

Untitled

tangled wires kill

my high

kill my high like

bain [brain, misspelled] i die

when it happens

i ask why

nobody knows

why

brain i die.

Roo Ode to roaches + clips

burnt little one

still standing

tall little fin.

"still has weed

in it" is what they say to

me so you

blow and i go

blow-i-go.

too high

sound is hurting

my face and

ears and burning my throat

feels like i ate fire.

Untitled

double vission [misspelled, like a herb]

darting eyes

moving

wallpaper

Untitled

feeling like falling

going up

falling down

train coming to get me

closer + closer ascending [wdf?]

feels like falling

untitled

passing out

can't move

blurred vision

scribbly scrabbly mic scripty ipty

this is how i be if writing and i am

wazza wazza [scribbled around the page]

paralyzed from the mind down

TEAM JOLIE!

Untitled

Wends [wendy's] would

be good now

junior cheese

baked potato and

chive caesar celled [lmao]

mix and fix thing

IC ANT SPELL!

Untitled

I feel like a crackhead

my legs keep moving like a nervous tick but its all in my head.

the last two Untitled's weren't poems.

i think they were just ramblings.

they don't sound too much like poems.

everything i started my poems with

i ended them with the same thing !

how crackhead.

so.

its 3am and i drank a WHOLE bottle of water

in one sitting.

pretty rare for me

i must be dehydrated or something

too much cotton mouth is messin with my

salivating system or something.

btw for breakfast Lindsay Lohan eats 2/3 eggwhites, vegetables and one banana.

goodnight :D!

something else

music: green day - wake me up when september ends

i'm bored. and getting oh-so-tired of seeing my face (and everything else) in the mirror everyday. gag. i'm sweating like hell. you know what? i want a crush. a real one, not a celebrity. [current celebrity crush besides Johnny Depp: ami james] everybody knows celebrities aren't real ! i love saying that. helps me cope. haha. they're not real. not real meaning i don't exist in their universe. so anyways. someone i can go ah :sigh: over. and puke my brains out for. i'll need the motivation. if i'm sounding like a sad case, don't remind me.
nothing exciting has happend. i smoked from a hooka [sp?]. soon after that, felt queazy [is that how you spell it?]. and hot. took a cold shower and sat in the sauna aka my room.
got chased by alot of butterflies today. bad day. and in the heat too. i can't run from butterflies in this humidity. instead i bolted behind whoever was closest in front of me and hid for a few seconds until they forgot about me and flew away.
no word about my brother yet. more about that in later posts. i hope hes okay and keeping cool.
i can't wait til' i get a job or something. money in the bank. i owe the bank a bunch of money. banks suck, i dont want a bank account anymore. i want my own buzznet book ..so cheap, yet so expensive. ugh SERENITY NOW!! ^_^
i hate to sound like i'm complaining. i'm not complaining. i'm venting of course. theres nobody else to tell this to so, yeah. go average joes. :)

gone for a day

i'm waiting for my father to finish eating so he can drive me to my mom's house. tomorrow i'm supposed to get teeth removed (4 in all, but i'm not sure if they're gonna do it all on the same day) to make way for my braces. i'm so scared ! they said if i want to be put to sleep to not eat 6 hours prior to my appointment. soo i'm going to sleep over my mom's house. save some money u know u know. and hopefully everything will go swell. and i can go to the movies on friday. :}

new buzznet stuff

totally awesome duuuuude !

loafin' it.